Yeah, well maybe that statement is only true for veteran teachers because this one is scared to death!
I haven't been observed since college and worry that I won't do well on this observation today.
The fact is, I teach better when it's just me and the kids. Just seeing an adult walk by the door gives me butterflies because I know they can hear what I'm saying.
When I'm alone with kids I feel free to be silly or do whatever it takes to keep their attention. I'm willing to jump around and sing if that's what I have to do to make them learn their letters. Having an adult in the background writing things down in a notebook will turn my face red for sure!
I turned red and blotchy every time I was observed at college. It was so bad that one 1st grader raised her hand in the middle of my math lesson to ask,
"Miss Pelletier? What is that red all over your neck?"
"That means Miss Pelletier is excited about this lesson, Katie!" was my quick reply.
Needless to say, my fellow student teacher and observer quietly giggled at the situation. They all knew I was as nervous as a girl could be!
Just imaging this picture, all in red, all over my neck and face.
Embarrassing???
"Oh Miss Yellow Shoes..." you say, "That was one time. I'm sure you're wonderful!"
Ok then, here's a story from my first day teaching.
Not only am I scared to death in front of these 4 year old, but I also have a concerned parent sitting on the floor next to his little boy. I sing "Old MacDonald Had A Farm" totally off key and actually mess up some of the animal sounds.
Things only get better from here because now the principal is standing in my doorway watching me draw the most horrible letter "B" on the whiteboard the education world has ever seen.
My voice was cracking, my hands were shaking, and I just know that I was as red as a tomato.
I know I'm lacking confidence, and I probably just need to get over it...but insecurities are hard to erase.
Wish me luck today?
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